Lonely

For some reason at this moment I feel really lonely. Maybe its that I’ven’t see Jenni in one too many days; Maybe its the marriage chapter in Bill’s book, and the crap with my sister friend; Maybe because I’ve been sleeping too long and alone; Maybe tis because close friends have seen long relationships just sorta grow into something more and romantic.

I’ve been debating why I’m single. I’ve had some other guys ask me that question. By any account I should be comfortably in a LTR. i don’t play games — being faithful is something I honestly believe in; Its not just nice but its the respect that I owe the other person.

Maybe its because I don’t want to “date.” I want to get through that as quickly as possible and get onto the “going steady” part. I want to start dreaming and fantasizing about the future. I enjoy living in the present but I’d much rather think about what can be, and make that happen.

So while in my future (as envisioned by Idealview®) I’m happily in love with and in a civil union with the man who is the love of my life with 2.05 children.

Maybe its because I expect a lot from myself and someone else is why I’m single? Do I scare people away by being too demanding on the first contact? I know I shouldn’t change a date into a “will this be the one” interview, but I do it anyways, despite my best intentions.

Anyone want a date?