February 15, 2003
Pissed/Oppressed
I am Pissed. I am pissed at the spot society has placed me in. I am stuck. I am oppressed and I don't know what to do about it.
Moisés, Moisés said something interesting. I just can't place my finger on it.
To some extent I'm still wearing two masks - two identities - or more.
Am I making my decisions because they have been dictated to me by the masses? The Oppressors? What ever happened to that or an instinct within me that had that desire to go up and find a mate? I'm playing on the oppressor's field - not one I've created.
But, what i I play on the field by my rules? Am I bound to be hurt physically? Maybe ridiculed? tied to a fence and let to die like Matt Sheppard?
It is that that scares me - not the rejection - or maybe the ear of coming out and rejection at the same time. Asking another guy out who I don't know at a "non-gay" place carries so many risks with it, that are just well so utterly amazing.
Its amazing but if/when I ask someone out in those contexts one possible outcome I have in the back of my head that I have to consider is that I've asked someone who would consider killing me because of hat?
Does society realize thats where at least I come from? I would gander that I'm not the only one.
Death should not be something that I see as a possibility when I ask someone out, straight people don't have to deal with it so why should I?
Because I am one and weak without others.
Thats depressing but a true thing to say about myself.
I still would at this very moment not choose to be gay. although it is part of me that I cherish. I know my strength comes from my pain, my experience - those dreams are the ones that keep me going.
Where is the me in that? Thats a big kahunah of desire with lots o desire chains leading up to it. Its such a overriding desire of mine that I cannot deny myself it because it is one o the major things that defines me. That i what keeps me reaching and straining for.
I've drained myself of thoughts again, hopefully the idea brand gas station won't be so overly demanding to me next time
Yeah we're all pissed... But you... Your gay man. AND yes society does not like that, but you are threat to the masses of sheep pussy fuckers out there.. Ok gay isn't excepted, GET OVER IT! Write about something MORE IMPORTANT!
Hey 5MOK3, u are a fucking piece of shit.
Don't you see that this dude already knows how fucked ppl are, esp. about his sexual orientation. You are fuckin ignorant. He's obviously writing this blog to help channel his feelings into somthing less destructive then say, killing himself. so just be glad of that, don't tell him he's wasting his time or that his iisues aren't important. and how the FUCK can u tell anybody to GET OVER Gay Acceptance (not EXCEPTENCE u fuckin dumb shit) . By saying you accept it, you are accepting a set of values that allows an already isolated group of individuals to be exploited, ridiculed, and basically emotionally raped. This is equal to racism in my mind. YOU are part of the problem. Thats why he made this page, u fucking dill hole. So do us all a favour and save your dumbass comments for your dumbass friends, and leave this page for ppl who actually have somthing useful to say.
goddamn ur a tool.
Nick:
fuck that guy man. he obviously doesn't have a damn clue what your all about, and neither do i for that matter. But i do know that we share a common factor. We're both pissed, im sure about totally different things, but its my pissed off attitude that brought me to this site. And im feeling fairly passionate about maybe saying somthing that will mean somthing to someone out there, being that im in a fairly dark place in my life right now. I just wanna say that society is so damn pedantic. There's a lot more ppl in this world who are so consumed (and often more specifically *corrupted*) by the idiotic world around them that Ignorance isn't only not an option, but pretty much served to them on a hot steamy platter. Ppl can be so ridiculous, and on average are. The thing i like about gay ppl, coming from a straight viewpoint, is that they are born into a fighting role. You guys an girls have it hard from the start, and there arent enough ppl like me who can fucking see past just a mere characteristical difference. How can i be? Say i did hate homo's, would i also in saying so, also hate ppl who like sardines? I don't like sardines, i would never go out of my way to obtain them, but im not gunna hate u for liking them. See how friggin lame ppl are. I have to say tho, the gay community hs come a long way in the last 40 or 50 years. I'm just glad ppl finally stopped letting non gay's walk all over them. Its just cruel and barbaric. But i guess they kno no better. Theres so many contadictions/paradoxs in social information that its utterly impossible to find truth. And that goes with everything man, and seriously i dont think things are going to get better anytime soon. I see it everyday, whether minor or major, holes upon holes in communicational occurances. and this PISSES ME OFF. How the hell are we supposed to function on this planet if all we do is lie to each other, create increduloous false feelings towareds each other that we end up fucking up so many other ppl for the sake of the self. Its this goddamn greed and narrowmindedness that so many ppl share that its simply irreversable. Just read the book Frankenstien by Mary Shelly. Perfect example of how society can fuck up anybody.
Well thats about it for now, i hope some of these words can stir a couple of ideas about hwo to deal with this fuckin world.
another pissed off human, ~~~~~~jung'rrr
ps. if u havent seen this then u should i think,
South Park ep. #? : Big gay al's big gay boat ride
I kno this show is pretty harsh and crude, but its raises a lot of political and social issues that i find interesting to the max! I think matt stone and trey parker are geniuses for bringing these totally supremely dumb issues of thw world to the plain, simple, totally honest surface of humanity.
"what if a dog is gay?" lmao pure genious
I kno this is an old entry, but it pissed me off lol so im gunna rant just a LIL bit :)
Hey 5MOK3, u are a fucking piece of shit.
Don't you see that this dude already knows how fucked ppl are, esp. about his sexual orientation. You are fuckin ignorant. He's obviously writing this blog to help channel his feelings into somthing less destructive then say, killing himself. so just be glad of that, don't tell him he's wasting his time or that his iisues aren't important. and how the FUCK can u tell anybody to GET OVER Gay Acceptance (not EXCEPTENCE u fuckin dumb shit) . By saying you accept it, you are accepting a set of values that allows an already isolated group of individuals to be exploited, ridiculed, and basically emotionally raped. This is equal to racism in my mind. YOU are part of the problem. Thats why he made this page, u fucking dill hole. So do us all a favour and save your dumbass comments for your dumbass friends, and leave this page for ppl who actually have somthing useful to say.
goddamn ur a tool.
Nick:
fuck that guy man. he obviously doesn't have a damn clue what your all about, and neither do i for that matter. But i do know that we share a common factor. We're both pissed, im sure about totally different things, but its my pissed off attitude that brought me to this site. And im feeling fairly passionate about maybe saying somthing that will mean somthing to someone out there, being that im in a fairly dark place in my life right now. I just wanna say that society is so damn pedantic. There's a lot more ppl in this world who are so consumed (and often more specifically *corrupted*) by the idiotic world around them that Ignorance isn't only not an option, but pretty much served to them on a hot steamy platter. Ppl can be so ridiculous, and on average are. The thing i like about gay ppl, coming from a straight viewpoint, is that they are born into a fighting role. You guys an girls have it hard from the start, and there arent enough ppl like me who can fucking see past just a mere characteristical difference. How can i be? Say i did hate homo's, would i also in saying so, also hate ppl who like sardines? I don't like sardines, i would never go out of my way to obtain them, but im not gunna hate u for liking them. See how friggin lame ppl are. I have to say tho, the gay community hs come a long way in the last 40 or 50 years. I'm just glad ppl finally stopped letting non gay's walk all over them. Its just cruel and barbaric. But i guess they kno no better. Theres so many contadictions/paradoxs in social information that its utterly impossible to find truth. And that goes with everything man, and seriously i dont think things are going to get better anytime soon. I see it everyday, whether minor or major, holes upon holes in communicational occurances. and this PISSES ME OFF. How the hell are we supposed to function on this planet if all we do is lie to each other, create increduloous false feelings towareds each other that we end up fucking up so many other ppl for the sake of the self. Its this goddamn greed and narrowmindedness that so many ppl share that its simply irreversable. Just read the book Frankenstien by Mary Shelly. Perfect example of how society can fuck up anybody.
Well thats about it for now, i hope some of these words can stir a couple of ideas about hwo to deal with this fuckin world.
another pissed off human, ~~~~~~jung'rrr
ps. if u havent seen this then u should i think,
South Park ep. #? : Big gay al's big gay boat ride
I kno this show is pretty harsh and crude, but its raises a lot of political and social issues that i find interesting to the max! I think matt stone and trey parker are geniuses for bringing these totally supremely dumb issues of thw world to the plain, simple, totally honest surface of humanity.
"what if a dog is gay?" lmao pure genious