June 07, 2003
Gimme a Fork
I think I should take to stabbing myself with a fork, it would be more productive.
I keep telling myself I'm over Shawn; I've moved on; That in the past. Shit like that. I just keep saying it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. But I still torture myself by viewing his website and looking at the pictures and everything.
I finally said fuck it, and configured my router to block all URL's with his domain name in it. All it takes is a simple configuration to undo, but at least I've gotta put some effort into it now, no random URL browsing.
I spent a good hour tonight trying to convince Andy to drive down here and spend the night and cuddle. He's sweet, but he rightly said no. Philo, I wish I had his control over the evil second brain.
Its time to start dating again. Period.