January 20, 2006
Feedback
I think one of those things that is hardest for me coming from the theatre/geek tech background I've got, is not giving feedback. I always want to tell people what I think as politely as possible. (Okay, sometimes if they don't get my point I'll be downright rude to get their attention, but I really try to be a polite bird.. eerr guy.)
What perplexes me about work is I can't get enough feedback, I'm literally begging for people to give me feedback. Its frustrating.
In the theatre I would at least get feedback such as "It was good" or "I enjoyed it." These comments really annoyed me. I wanted details, specifics, what people especially liked, and what they hated.
In my view of things, we owe this to each other as humans: to provide feedback so we can all better ourselves.
So you can understand my frustration when I get an email from someone who is a few rungs above the ladder from me writes "There is not going to be any discussions with me involving a critique this document or any aspect of the management of this project." I'll fully admit that I'm pissed about how the project was implemented and designed and what we've gotten out of it. And I'll admit I went a little over the top with this person.
Perhaps this is something that is wrong with American business: That people cannot and will not take criticism and feedback. I think one of the driving forces behind TQM, Six Sigma, etc is feedback. You cannot get better if you can't see whats wrong. And you cannot see what wrong on your own. Freud said "In self-analysis the danger of incompleteness is particularly great. One is too soon satisfied with a part[ial] explanation." I cannot be fully aware of what I'm doing wrong, so I depend and rely on others to tell me.
Speaking of which I fully expect to get some borderline nasty comments about this entry. I've been asked to work on one of our internal non-profit's website, so the site URL is going out to the group leader. So, its conceivable that this non-Freud person mentioned above could end up reading this. To that person, I've been open and honest, and I apologize for my occasional unfairness and disrespect.
LoL, well this comment isn't one of the borderline nasty ones, but I just wanted to say I agree with you- the only way we can grow in anything is by getting feedback. There are many forms it can take from a casual verbal snippet to a formal exam and critique, and sometimes it is hard to find what we need. Whatever form it takes, an honest (and preferably polite) opinion from another person can do more for professional growth than any amount of introspection. I honestly wonder though if the problem is more people refusing to hear the feedback, or people being afraid to offer it. Especially in closer-knit offices and working relationships, we develop a fear of something coming out wrong and hurting the other person's feelings. Instead of giving it our best shot and working to get our meaning across, we take the easy way out and just let it go.
Its ironic, I read the document referenced tonight. The issue that caused the scuttlebutt was actually defined in it. Sigh, I hate/love being able to tell people, "I told you so."
On days when it's 20 degrees and light snow is gently wafting on the 50 mph wind (yes, we did have a day like that recently), I like to stand at the kitchen window, eating my morning banana, and reflect on the fact that I know the one indispensible man in the Western Hemisphere, who - come snow, wind, high water, skyrocketing fuel prices, terrorist attack or category 5 hurricane - makes it all possible. Knowing he's gay makes it just that much more delicious and fills me with enormous satisfaction and pride. I only regret that I can't think of anything nasty to say, borderline or otherwise. I'll take a raincheck on that, if I may.
:D