Nick's Place

Nicholas Barnard Skill Development Paper #3 TA: Sandy Jewett

1) The skill I chose was the SOLER Method. The SOLER Method is an active listening position. It involved facing the person directly, with an open body position, while maintaining active eye contact in a relaxed position. It shows others that we are listening and also reminds the one listening that they are listening.

2) a) When I used the skill I was talking with Jenni, a close friend. We were sitting on a couch at Starbucks. I wasn't saying anything but listening and drinking coffee. I turned towards her even though it was a weird position on the couch. b) Jenni didn't change to topic of her conversation or really anything. But after I used the skill I asked her if she noticed a change. She did note that I seemed to be making more of a direct effort to listen. C) I felt cautious before I used the skill because I wanted to make using it appear as natural as possible, and not arouse her suspicions. I felt uncomfortable while I used the skill because of the physical position required on a couch side by side. I felt relaxed after I used the skill because I realized that the skill must be used flexibly, making the effort to face a person an listen to them actively with active eye contact is more important than just the physical turning, the SOLER method is very much about using your physical state to reinforce your mental state. d) On a scale of one to ten I think I used this skill at a nine. I made a concerted effort to properly apply the skill, but I feel I did not use the skill in a situation that needed it, in that sense I failed using the skill.

3) a) I felt that this skill was partially successful. I feel that it would be of more use with someone who I am just getting to know, instead of a friend I have known for eight years. I felt that it accomplished practicing the skill but did not change very much in the moment for Jenni and I. B) I plan to use this skill again in the future. I think two situations where it will be very useful are in interviews and meeting people for the first time.