Nicholas Barnard PHL 399: The Feeling of Success 1/29/03
The most clearly defined feeling of success that I have ever experienced occurred while I was whacking the cast on my leg with a cane.
While for many people this is would be an unpleasant experience, it was not the cane, but instead the fact that I was just finishing the most fulfilling scene I have ever performed.
I am theatrical artist. I use that term specifically because I work in all different areas of theatre, technical, acting, administrative, playwriting, directing, and producing. What drives me in theatre is not the feeling of success, but instead the feeling of failure. I feel secure in stating that in every theatrical endeavor I have attempted, with the exception of the scene mentioned above from Neil Simon's The Good Doctor, I have failed in some way shape or form.
The physical feelings that I experienced at that moment, was an intense adrenaline rush; I was ready at that moment to take on the world. I was hyperaware of everything around me and time seemed to slow around me. I had a euphoric feeling, composed of light-headedness, and a complete feeling of being in the moment. I was physically and completely present in that moment, whereas at other times there are always thoughts not related to the task at hand. I had the rare feeling of being physically and mentally complete and in the same place.
This complete feeling of success is something that I have not experienced before that time or since that time. Perhaps the feeling of success is directly related to where and how you set your goals. Similar to a drug, once you've reached that level with one activity, your tolerance goes up, and eventually you cannot succeed well enough to get the complete-success feeling that I experienced.