Is love only really love when its illogical? Stated differently is love when there is no logical benefit for yourself?<\/p>\n
I got on this thread when I was thinking about my past relationships. I’ve been thinking about S, T, G, J, and D. (The alphabet soup lets me leave names out, bear with me.)<\/p>\n
I got started on this thinking about when I went on a date with G, who is HIV positive. I know we talked on the phone a few times, and I saw him at work. I was the one to say that, “I like you as a friend but not romantically.” He then basically accused me of not wanting to date him because he was HIV positive, despite the fact that I told him that his HIV status played no role in my deliberations.<\/p>\n
This wasn’t just a quick spur of the moment decision. I spent a good few days thinking about it and making sure that his HIV status wasn’t a factor.<\/p>\n
But I digress. My point is with G it was a logical process. I’m quite sure I could’ve flow charted my decision process. It was that logical.<\/p>\n
But with S, and to some extent with T, it was just a feeling, something that swept me up. I quite remember with S and a bit with T attempting to explain my way to why I felt the way I felt or was doing what I was doing, but I just gave up finding no logical grounds for where I stand.<\/p>\n
I think love logically can only be expressed as a tautology. I love ____ because he’s _____. This works fine with family. (i.e. I love my mom because she’s my mom.) It works well with socially recognized institutions. (i.e. Parenthood, Marriage.) But does a shitty job with boyfriends and relationships that don’t fall in this category.<\/p>\n
For instance, there is no reason to explain why I love Jenni; you just have to know us and our history, and even then its not quite logical. Whereas I can explain why I love my mom in eight words, most people would expect significantly more words to explain why I love Jenni or S. I feel perfectly justified in saying that “I love Jenni, because she’s Jenni.” Its not conditional, its not logical.<\/p>\n
I believe love, when its true, only starts, but never stops.<\/p>\n
I love S because he is S. It would be a lot easier if I could attach conditions to this, like I enjoy spending time with S ergo I love him. Because then I could apply logic to it. (i.e. I’m not spending anytime with S therefore I can’t love him. See if that were true, I couldn’t say I love S, but I do love S. (This love stuff is like Quantum Physics, forget about common sense.)<\/p>\n
Okay two more letters, errr people to cover. No. I’m not going to cover J and D. Both of those are triumphs of biology over logic or love.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Is love only really love when its illogical? Stated differently is love when there is no logical benefit for yourself? I got on this thread when I was thinking about my past relationships. I’ve been thinking about S, T, G, J, and D. (The alphabet soup lets me leave names out, bear with me.) I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2208","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2208","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2208"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2208\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2208"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2208"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.inmff.net\/peidm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2208"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}